Tuesday 3 May 2011

Take My Breath Away.

Well things are going down hill so rapidly I'm wondering whether I'll ever climb back up. Spent the day waiting to hear from the specialist center, by 3pm I cracked and phoned them. The secretary took a message saying they were all out at the clinic or on ward rounds but she would pass the message on to the first person through the door. Hope that is sooner rather than later.

Got two letters from the inland revenue. One telling me what this year's tax credit will be. The other told me they had miscalculated my payments last year and now owe me nearly £400. In fact they owe me than they say I owe them so why not forget paying me back and just take it as payment? A classic case of the right hand not knowing what the left is doing if ever I saw one. Which reminds me, must dig out my evidence and write that shitty letter.

In the news five people arrested near the Sellafield nuclear plant under the terrorism act. Well, well, well that didn't take long did it. Unless of course they are innocent tourists that have been jumped on by over twitchy security for 'looking at me in a funny way and possessing a beard.' Time will tell, eventually.

My tomatoes have survived their first night outside but am not happy to hear we are expecting a frost tonight. Operation wrap up will begin at 1800 hours, dammit. I have carrots! And Basil and some of the flower seeds I've planted have also started to appear. No sign of the Sweet Peas yet though but I'm still hopeful. It is such a shame that it is slightly to cold to sit in the garden, there is nothing I like better when not feeling well than to sit in the fresh air and listen to the birdies singing.

Today has been one big struggle. I've struggled to get out of bed, bath, eat, drink, walk or take my meds because I just can't breathe. I've also struggled to keep my temper and my good humour as the frustration is already setting in. I hate these bad days especially when they turn into bad weeks or months, as this one is threatening to do. This time last week I was, well not exactly fine, but able to talk walk and do most of what I wanted to do without the need to rest every couple of minutes. Now even going up and downstairs on my bottom is too much effort and leaves me gasping like a fish out of water with the effort.

Finally got the call, am being admitted as soon as they have a bed, hopefully tomorrow but more likely Thursday. In the meantime I have to go to see my GP tonight and get an assessment as to whether I need to go to my local hospital until a bed comes free. I hate my local hospital with every fiber of my being so I will not be going there unless I'm unconscious and have no say in the matter. And even then I'd object.

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